Safflower Oil Challenge We Discussed:

Walking Club after School on M,W, and F each week in surrounding neighborhood; if it raining we will just walk in the school. If you want to participate you are welcomed, just bring your walking shoes.

Safflower Challenge: Measure your waste line, Buy a bottle of Safflower Oil, Look at the label. You want the Safflower Oil that says “7-12g Polyunsaturated Fat per serving.” Some Safflower oils are made specifically for frying and will say only 2 (you don’t want that one).

Safflower Oil Health Benefits
As safflower oil contains high amounts of polyunsaturated fats, it helps in creation of prostaglandins, hormone-like compounds aid in strengthening the cell membranes and also in the proper functioning of the body.

It is effective in eliminating the excess fat accumulated in the body, helps in losing weight. Brown fat is present in several areas of the body which is a major factor that aids in burning calories, the cis-linoleic acid present in safflower oil gets converted into gamma linolenic acid (GLA) that triggers the brown fat to burn calories.

Many doctors and dietitians recommend the use of safflower oil to people suffering from diabetes as research has been conducted to find the benefits of safflower oil in older diabetic women who are overweight. These women were asked to take safflower oil supplements for a period of sixteen weeks, and the results that showed were entirely positive. It was observed that they not only lost excess fat, but there was also a significant decline in their blood sugar levels.

Safflower helps in the reduction of the level of cholesterol in the blood which reduces the risk of heart diseases in the individual and can strengthen the immune system. Using safflower oil is an effective method of curing premenstrual syndrome. Consuming safflower oil instead of hormonal drugs helps in regularizing menstrual cycles, thus getting rid of the problem of irregular periods.

This oil can also promote hair growth and healthy skin as it contains vitamin E. People who have dry, brittle hair as well as color treated or premed hair are recommended to get a regular safflower oil massage for healthy looking, shiny hair. This odorless oil is mild and has a very light texture and so it is easily absorbed by the scalp. Massaging safflower oil on the head will improve blood circulation and make hair healthy and strong.

Skin benefits: helps in moisturizing the skin, especially during the dry winter months. Because of its light and non greasy texture, it is easily absorbed by the skin and it makes the skin smooth and supple, and is recommended for treating acne, scars, wrinkles and extremely dry flaky skin. It does not clog pores and hence can be used by people who have sensitive skin.

Safflower Oil Reduces Belly Fat by an increase in the metabolism of the body, thereby preventing the accumulation of fat in body. Safflower oil triggers the production of a hormone named adiponectin which assists in the catabolism of fatty acids. In the presence of safflower oil, the adiponectin production increases up to 20% than usual. Thus, the process of fat burning is escalated which eventually results in loss of weight. Besides, it also alters the function of the fat cells, so that they tend to burn fats and release energy instead of accumulating fats. Safflower is capable of reducing the belly fat without any alteration in diet or exercise regimen of a person. Moreover, it also increases the muscle mass which makes the body leaner and stronger.

Safflower oil benefits in losing belly fat have been backed by a study conducted by Ohio State University. A group of diabetic women in the post-menopausal age were surveyed for this purpose. This group took safflower oil for 16 weeks without altering their diet or exercise routine. At the end of 16 weeks, the women reported a loss of about 3 pounds in their weight along with a reduction in their belly fat. Moreover, the rate of weight loss remained even throughout the study period, thereby alleviating any risks associated with quick weight loss. Thus, safflower oil proves better than any other weight loss remedies available in the market.

The results of this study do not necessarily apply to men and women of all ages. They are mostly specific to obese women in the pre and post menopausal age. Similarly, the efficacy of safflower oil supplements is not comparable with the liquid oil. Hence, the best way to avail the safflower oil benefits is by incorporating it in your daily diet.

Adult Relationships and Respect

Respect is a very large topic... We will narrow the focus and write different installments:

Respect is a feeling, deep admiration, elicited by their abilities, qualities, achievements, and works of good deeds or morals, a dutiful regard for others.

Ignorance on the other hand is a lack of knowledge, education, or awareness.

So, are all these people in society showing disrespect, ignorant, or are they blatantly being rude and disrespectful? What makes us as a society allow them to get away with these negative actions as if it does not matter anymore? Have we lost so much self respect that anything goes now?

Let's look at respect amongst women: If everyone would follow this there would be no cheating! Most women are stronger than men on some levels, as women are premeditated and men tend to be more spontaneous. Spontaneity is kind of like a kid with a pocket of money in a candy store... They don't think of the long term of consequences sometime... Keeping in mind I am talking about most men; not all, there are always exceptions to every rule or statistic.

Now, if a woman knows a man is taken or has a wife, girlfriend, live-in, whatever... Then it is the responsibility of that woman to show respect to that other woman. Stay away from him, he is not yours... If every woman would do this there would be little cheating in the world, and if the man lied to you, tell!

Men can help by not making yourself available to another woman. You have a responsibility to your significant other to be committed and devoted to her. Sure you will hear sob stories and want to help some damsel in distress; don't do it, it's not your job. Sure, you might see a sexy body and wish you had that. Sure, you might see young and want that young feeling again. Sure, you might want good conversation b/c your wife is too busy with the kids... But don't do it, you have to devote yourself to who you have already chosen.

Men, "Confiding" in another woman other than your mother, sister, or blood relation... is the most hurt you can give your woman... You just gave your trust away, like breaking confidentiality to your marriage.

Making excuses does not let you off the hook, they only show you are weak minded and couldn't follow through with a commitment. Either do what is the respectful, or decide you don't love your spouse and get a divorce.

I recently heard of a case where the "other woman" is being sued by the wife for wrecking the home an the wife received millions because she proved the other woman acted willfully and set out to seduce a married man; this is called, "Alienation of Affection," and can be filed in the following states: North Carolina, Illinois, Mississippi, New Mexico, South Dakota, and Utah. What do you think; if you knew you could be sued for being interference, causing a marriage to be broken, or aiding in it not being able to be reconciled...? Would you take the chance in messing with someone's spouse?

I know I got a little side-tracked here, but the point is... It is all a disrespectful act! The respectful thing is to follow-through with your words, keep your commitments, if it doesn't belong to you, and just leave it alone. If you are in an unhappy place, communicate it to your partner, work to repair it, or divorce so you can move on... Those of you, who were never married, make sure you communicate to your significant other; you are done, before moving on.

When the dream comes alive as we meet...
immortal...
embrace...
peace...
and the night sky
is in my palm,
from each star
you have given me,
every time you make
me smile,
for in my dreams you rescue me, quench my thirst, and empower my choice...
the trust I have in you burns the wheat from the chaff as an act of faith

~Elizabeth Corbin

Help the Children after the Divorce! By Elizabeth Corbin

Let the divorce be final and allow the children the benefit of two households, two sets of parties, two sets of families, etc. That is one of the benefits for divorced kids and they look forward to it; don’t come together and combine their parties, spend time sitting and having dinner at your ex-wife’s house, or having a “family” night when you are no longer a family. It may save you money but it racks havoc on the children’s emotional well-being. Children always hope their biological parents will reunite and they can all be one big happy family, so every time you come together you are giving them a false hope.

In my practice I see so many kiddos after holidays, birthdays, and family days who are disappointed and it takes weeks of strategies to help them recover and cope from well meaning parents who for whatever reason feel they need to keep some string attached to their ex-spouse.

I have seen several possible reasons parents choose to do this to their kids/families: 1. Romanticism- just like wanting the children to believe in Santa as long as you can, because it is cute or fun for you; you are the one not wanting to completely let go of the past and move forward. 2. Guilt- not wanting to believe everything has changed and you may have been the cause of it, or you let the kids down by not holding the marriage together, etc. 3. Immaturity- Adults that haven’t matured past a certain level; wanting to appear they are doing this for the kids. 4. Passive- The parent that goes along with whatever the controlling parent says for fear of causing added drama.

Once a family is split, they need to remain split unless mom and dad have decided to be a couple again and really work on being one productive unit. Once the divorce is final you are not “one unit” any longer; are two. There is nothing wrong with living as two units and showing the kids they can enjoy some benefits of having two families… I would not advise a man to go to his ex-wife’s house or her family for any gatherings, nor would I advise a woman to go to her ex-husband’s for the kid’s birthday party. It is far better for a child to have a birthday or Christmas at each house.

So what if one parent makes more money than the other and you can’t offer to spoil the child as much as your ex-spouse? Communication is the key and if you are upfront and honest about communicating things, and you have raised a mature individual in your child s/he will eventually see and understand you did the best you could with what you had for his/her well-being.

It takes weeks to help a child recover and learn coping strategies from disappointment on high hopes parents will reconsolidate every time they see those two spend time together.

In addition to all the disappointment you cause the children by trying to combine things, you also create a barrier for the new relationship in your life; that’s if you have someone. You may not be able to keep a new relationship going if you spend your time at your ex-spouses place. Most people will be happy for you allowing them to be part of your family as long as you are not dragging the baggage of their biological mother/father along with you.

"Dating," Women attracting Men

I found this article that was good about dating. I need to add my two cents to this of course:

First, Most of these women in the article were in their twenties and thirties and so many of them really are not looking for their penguin yet and are still interested in not being settled down. I say this because when you get into your forties and over, many of life's changes are happening to you. Thus, being truly ready to settle down; does not mean you have to "settle." If he has some characteristics that really bother you, don't go down that road.

Secondly, when I was taught the ways of the women for my culture, it was nut-shelled as this: Have a genuine respect for the other woman. If he has a woman in his life such as girlfriend, wife, live-in... Then stay away from him in any romantic way and don't allow that door to be opened between the two of you. If all women would do this, there would be no cheating or worry of cheating.

Thirdly, if you are a person who has had an affair off and on for 17 years with the same person and they are married, you obviously have an emotional attachment to that person. Meaning you are stuck in that immature relationship because of issues you have not dealt with in your life. Do yourself a favor, break the ties, and close all doors to that person; never letting them in again, and get counseling to sever those soul ties! You are the only one who can change yourself, and if you keep opened doors to your weaknesses, a new woman is not going to want to start off in a negative way with ladies of your past!
~by Elizabeth Corbin


Here’s the article that sparked all that:


By Kenrya Rankin Naasel, Glamour magazine

Attracting guys has never been a problem for Julie Wilson, 34. The Greensboro, North Carolina, native has been proposed to an astonishing four times. “My friends can’t understand why even so-called players want to run down the aisle with me,” she says. “And they keep calling me long after the relationship ends.” Wilson’s fantastic, but so are plenty of other girls—so what is it about women like her that men just can’t resist? What do they know that the rest of us don’t? We present to you: their secrets! Soak ‘em in, then do some super-attracting of your own.

Go Out Looking for a Good Time—Not Your Future Husband
Super-attractor Rule No. 1: Don’t go hunting. “Too many girls focus on meeting The One when they should be looking for a tasty drink and a fun night out,” says Amber Kallor, a 26-year-old in New York City who’s known for getting guys of all stripes—hipsters, bankers, sailors, you name it—hopelessly hooked. “When you’re out seeking your ‘penguin’—you know, because penguins mate for life—men sense that, and no guy wants or needs that kind of pressure.” Adam LoDolce, a Boston-based dating coach and author of Being Alone Sucks!: How to Build Self-Esteem, Confidence and Social Freedom to Transform Your Dating and Social Life (cheesy title, solid advice), agrees. “There’s nothing more appealing than the girl who carries herself like she’s having a good time,” he says. “Who wouldn’t want to be around her?” So buy your own martini, and enjoy yourself. That’s penguin bait.

Never Bash Other Women
Another insight man magnets share: Being catty will get you nowhere with guys. Men want to know that you’re confident. “Think about it: If you two start dating, he has a mom, sisters and female friends he’ll want you to spend time with,” says Marie Salazar, 29, a marketer from San Francisco whose male buddies are all in love with her (or so say her annoyed girl-friends). “Showing a guy that it won’t be a nightmare to bring you to a family dinner is a good first step.” Philadelphian Meredith Klein, 23, sums it up this way: “Someone else’s strengths don’t make you look bad—but being jealous and insecure does.”

Be Easy
We’re not talking Jersey Shore easy; we’re talking easygoing. Guys are drawn to girls they can picture having fun with in either a dive bar or a schmancy restaurant. “Men appreciate that I can hang with their friends, kill it at a work event and chill at home,” says New Yorker LaNora Williams-Clark, 32, who has been single for a total of three months since she started dating more than 15 years ago. “It boils down to charm and an ability to roll with the punches.

Don’t Dress for Girls
The super-trendy stuff you’d wear to impress your friends often leaves men cold. Guys Glamour spoke to gave the thumbs-down to maxidresses (“They cover too much skin,” says Rob, 38), rompers (“How do you even pee?” asks Thomas, 36) and harem pants (“MC Hammer is calling,” quips Kyle, 30). But you don’t have to squeeze into a Kardashidress to get his attention, either. What’s universally sexy, according to men? A woman in a white tee, cute-butt jeans and a pair of heels. Done and done.

Be (Genuinely) Busy
This trick’s not about playing hard to get; it’s about having so much great stuff going on in your world that he wants to be a part of it. “Women who are genuinely busy feel more fulfilled, are happier and are more confident—three powerful magnets for attracting men,” says Angelica Perez-Litwin, Ph.D., a Nyack, New York, psychologist and relationship counselor. Says Mickelle Jackson, 30, a school administrator from Trenton, New Jersey, who’s had more than a few male friends confess romantic feelings: “If a man has to choose between a clingy beauty and an unavailable average girl, he will choose average every time.”

Two Words: No Bitching
When your crazy boss is blowing up your iPhone after hours and your sister is insisting you wear pistachio-and-melon-striped chiffon to her wedding, it can be easy to slip into a monologue about why life sucks. Don’t! “It makes you look like a drama queen, and if there’s one thing all guys hate, it’s drama,” says Christina Nguyen, a 31-year-old from Minneapolis who’s been told her fun-loving attitude makes her memorable. LoDolce agrees: “It’s impossible to flirt if you’re complaining.”

Let Him See Your Ambitious Side
It’s a corollary of “be busy”: Guys like women who have passions in life, so show yours! “When my husband and I were dating, he would always tell me how much my ambition inspired him to be better,” says Jessica Guberman, 34, a vice president of marketing and development for a national nonprofit in Princeton, New -Jersey. For Alexa Carlin, 20, of Wellington, Florida, fulfilling her dream of running her own fashion company caused a noticeable spike in male attention: “Girls who are motivated to accomplish their dreams show drive and determination—guys love those qualities.” Sharing your goals up front also affects the type of guy you attract. “High-quality men are drawn to ambitious women,” LoDolce believes. “I hate when women worry about intimidating men. If a guy is intimidated by you, he doesn’t deserve you.” Amen to that.

Be the Person You Want to Date
Sounds simple, but you can’t seek a man who is secure, self-assured and emotionally evolved if you’re not all of those things yourself. It’s basic relationship karma! “If you wouldn’t want to date yourself, then how can you expect someone else to want to date you?” says Lina Shivangi, a 31-year-old marketing director from Austin, Texas. Nadarah Butler, 31, a doctor living in Los Angeles who has never gone more than a year without a serious boyfriend, agrees: “If you haven’t figured out who you are yet, you can’t possibly know what you want in a guy.”

Week 7 - Healthier Lifestyle Program... FIBER!

Week 7: Add Fiber to your lifestyle. Remember we are adding and deleting things in our life to better our health, and we’ve already added the fruits and vegetables; there is more health to fiber than just fruits and veggies.

There are two types of fiber: Soluble (dissolves to form a gel in your system and is needed to lower blood cholesterol and glucose levels), and Insoluble (pushes what you’ve eaten through the digestive tract).

Why Fiber? It plays a role in preventing disease in your intestines, colon, rectum, and bowel, and keeping your GI Tract healthy is important because it is one of the main systems; it has to do with absorbing nutrients throughout your physical body.

Men should intake 30-38 grams, and women should intake 21-25 grams of fiber a day. Increase fiber in your diet gradually over a period of a few weeks so the natural bacteria in your digestive system will adjust to the change, and drink plenty of water. If you do it all at once you will bloat and be gassy.

Whole foods such as the following are the best because the fiber pills and supplements won’t have the nutrients:
• Grains and whole-grain products
• Fruits
• Vegetables
• Beans, peas and other legumes
• Nuts and seeds
;-)

Top Complaints in Men/Women

I didn't right these 2 articles; found it on the eharmony website, has many insights I am sure you can identify with or learn from; so I thought I'd share:

Men's Ten Complaints About Women
by Grant Langston, Sr Director, Content
You see us as projects you can "fix" (1/10)You meet us. You like us. You date us. You marry us. And somewhere along the way it might seem that you love us just as we are, but rarely does it work out that way. Women see potential. They see rough edges, and they want to sand them off. This makes us crazy. We don’t want to change. We have chosen our car, hair, friends, home and hobbies because we enjoy them. The knowledge that you are thinking, “If he could only….” is a deeply disturbing thought, and perhaps more sinister is the idea that this behavior is so common that even if you aren’t the kind of woman who wants change, we expect that you do and are only biding your time.
Your expectations are set by Hollywood and sky high (2/10) Hollywood strikes again. I have a buddy that has plans to attend a Nicholas Sparks book signing so he can tell the man to KNOCK IT OFF! Most women know at an intellectual level that their man isn’t going to be like George Clooney, or Brad Pitt or that Italian guy from Under the Tuscan Sun, but in their heart they want it. They’ve been fed a fantasy about romance and passion for so long that when a REAL act of love comes down the pike, he notices that the tread on your tires is low and buys a new set, it hardly even registers.
You're always looking down the road (3/10) Women tend to think about the next major step in life. Men tend to think about the next major meal. Certainly part of this is driven by biology. A 34-year-old single woman who wants to have children has to think about the future. She has to think about finding a quality partner, where they are going to live, is there enough room for the baby in the study? A 34-year-old single man has far less interest in planning or pushing towards some future major life goal. This difference in priorities often leaves women in the unpleasant position of saying, “next,” “next,” “next” when it comes to relationship events. There is a female drive to get answers to questions like, “What ARE we?”, “Are we exclusive yet?”, “Are we going to get married?” that makes it seem like they aren’t enjoying the now and only worry about the future.
You use your emotions as a weapon (4/10) You don’t mean to. I suppose it isn’t your fault that during an important conversation about the future of our relationship you start crying, but surely you understand that this derails the ability to pursue the issue at hand. You’ve, essentially, played a kind of trump card. If we continue to advocate our side, we’re bullies. If we give in, we’re weak.
You have a tendency to be critical (5/10) I’ve tried to avoid the word n-a-g, but there seems to be some internal mechanism that makes women predisposed to criticism, in the same way that men are predisposed to seek their man cave. It’s almost a cliché -- the wife that complains and makes demands, and the husband that just wants to be left alone to watch TV or work out in the garage.
You like to play coy (6/10) If you like us, let us know. If you don’t, let us go. This game where you pretend you don’t care and secretly hope we chase you down is for teenagers. You think men like the chase? Perhaps. You think we like guessing whether we’re wasting our time? No.
You fixate on what we’re thinking, when you should be watching what we’re doing (7/10) You ask, “What are you thinking?” and we say, “Nothing.” You figure this must be a lie, and decide that we aren’t willing to communicate with you. The problem is, this is the wrong question to ask. We’re action-oriented. You don’t need to ask what we’re thinking, just watch what we’re doing. Coming home late every night? We’re not happy at home. Uninterested in sex, probably; crushed by stress. Not calling you back even though we said, “I love you?” We don’t love you. You can save the questions about musings until you see a change in our behavior. That’s the surest sign that something needs to be discussed.
You don’t understand and/or like our need for alone time (8/10) This often expresses itself with regard to hobbies. Say a man likes to play golf and has played for years. Many a man has gotten into a relationship only to have the woman complain about the time he spends playing golf. She’s jealous of this time. Of course, if she loves him she should know that he NEEDS this time on the golf course. It’s his passion. It’s his release. Without it he will burn up with anxiety and frustration over life’s little indignities. Why does she get involved with a man who has a hobby she doesn’t like?
You have a complicated set of double standards (9/10) I could write a novel on this one. We only need look at the example of going dutch on a first date. You offer to split the check, and if we let you, you hold it against us. Really? You demand, quite rightly, to be in on all important relationship decisions, yet when we take you out and ask, “What would you like to do tonight?” you are angry that we haven’t taken charge of the situation. It’s a confusing set of double standards and antiquated rules that make it very difficult for us to know which move is the right one.
You want us to change, and then lose respect for us when we do. (10/10) It’s an interesting phenomenon. When a man and a woman get together it is likely that he will have some hobbies, tendencies, or habits that she doesn’t like. For instance, I have a friend that met and married a woman who wasn’t thrilled that he played in a band. She was a bit threatened by the attention he received and his time spent pursuing this. She told him, “I really wish you didn’t play in this band,” and because he loved her, he quit. Within a few months this woman was confiding to her friends, “I’m a little less attracted to him because he quit the band, and just did what I asked. Now, he just hangs out at home.” It’s a specific example, but a common problem. Clearly, the man should do what he feels he has to do, but we try to be accommodating, and to have that count against us is infuriating.

Women's Ten Biggest Complaints About Men
by Jeannie Assimos, Managing Editor, Content
Women's Ten Biggest Complaints About Men (1/11) Guys, we love and adore you, but there are certain things about you that drive us crazy! Here, we share women’s biggest gripes about the men they love. Our hope is you’ll learn a little, all the while remembering that we truly appreciate many of your other fine qualities (and don’t worry, we’ve got a men’s biggest complaints article about women being written as we type).
All Talk and No Action (2/11) No, we’re not talking about bedroom behavior. What many women have an issue with is men who SAY they are going to do something, but don’t follow through. Some good examples include telling her you will call -- and not picking up the phone. An even better example is telling a woman you are ready for a relationship, but your actions completely prove otherwise. Guys, be honest about who you are and where you are in life, and we’ll respect that a lot more.
You’re Dishonest About What You Want (3/11) This meshes well with point one, and deserves further explanation because this is really one of the biggest complaints we see from women about men. You tell a woman you are truly ready for commitment, pursue her … and then freak out. OR you have past entanglements (like that darn ex), which are really holding you back from being available for a relationship. Women would appreciate it so much more if men could be genuine with themselves and their partners about exactly what they want. We don’t want to get invested in you if you aren’t worth the time.
The Mama’s Boy (4/11) We are happy that you have a great relationship with your mother, but we don’t want to date your mother! Meddling mama’s can be a huge problem in a relationship, and even a deal breaker for many. Guys, it is important to set boundaries with your family and don’t let mom interfere in your life. It’s also important that you strive for balance in your romantic relationships, because women, as a rule, don’t want to play mama. Childish does not equal attractive.
The Bump on a Log (5/11) We saw this complaint a lot – guys who are no fun, uptight, dull, take no initiative to plan any dates, or who never have any ideas about where to go for dinner, vacations, activities, etc. If you are like this, it’s time to wake up and find your passion. Put a little energy into your relationship. Boring equals D.O.A in the dating world.
The Ogle-Master (6/11) You may think you are being slick, but we caught you glancing at the hot chick as she passed by. We completely get that you are a visual creature – but it is really hurtful if we are out with you and you can’t stop scoping out the brunette at the table next to us. Many women complained about this behavior, saying it truly bothered them and even ruined the entire evening. Practicing a little self restraint in this area will earn you major points.
Too Much Boy, Not Enough Man (7/11) At some point it’s time to grow up -- and ditch the Billabong t-shirts, guys. It drives women crazy when they have to remind their men to dress like a grown up and more importantly, act like one. There is definitely a time and place for having fun and being childlike, but the refusal to grow up and be responsible is a very tough pill to swallow for most women, who do want a mature or at least a maturing man with some sense of direction.
It’s All About You (8/11) Women want you to take an interest in them, to pay attention to things they like, and to WANT to know what is going on in their lives. A big complaint about some guys is that they just aren’t thoughtful and are downright self-absorbed, not concerned with their partners wants or needs. As we all know, for a relationship to be successful, both people must give of themselves.
Mr. Angry/Possessive (9/11) It is really hard to be around this personality type – for anyone! Women definitely do not like when a man treats them like a possession and not a person. Avoid things like checking up on your woman constantly, questioning her friendships with other men or women, or telling her what she can and can’t do. The same goes for the guy who just seems angry at the world, and has his girlfriend walking around on eggshells. Nice will get you a lot further than nasty, guys.
Too Much, Too Soon (10/11) On the opposite end of the commitment-phobe is the guy who actually talks marriage on a first, second or third date! Numerous women in the Advice community said their dates came on way too strong, invaded their personal space and raised serious red flags in the process. Demanding and overbearing were common complaints from women dealing with this issue.
He’s Way Too Comfortable (11/11) We’ll end on an easy-to-fix issue … the man who gets so comfy with his relationship that he lets it all hang out! Guys, close the bathroom door (and put down the toilet seat), put a little effort into your appearance (yes, that means showering and shaving before we go out) and keep on impressing us with your romantic gestures -- just like you did when we first started dating.